Joe Torre's championship seasons, Alex Rodriguez once said, were best framed by the scenes of Paul O'Neill and Bernie Williams diving onto victory piles, and by the sight of Derek Jeter pumping his right fist into a charged October night.
The post-dynasty years? Rodriguez just captured those perfectly in a single magazine shot.A-Rod is seen kissing his own buffed-out reflection in a mirror in the latest issue of Details. Remarkably enough, he struck this pose while knowing Sports Illustrated was about to drop a hammer that would leave his legacy in a million little pieces.
And there are people who still argue the Yankees are better off with him?
The signatures on his $305 million deal say Rodriguez is scheduled to be a Yankee after President Obama completes a possible second term in office. That would be another nine years of hard living with a diva who makes Whitney Houston look like a low-maintenance act.
A-Rod has admitted to being a steroid-pumped hoax, and yet the fallout from his drug use won't be the biggest long-term hurdle his employer has to clear. The Yankees have built their future around a selfish and misguided man, and the bimbo eruptions (with the slugger assuming the role of bimbo) keep coming whether A-Rod is playing a healthy third base in the Bronx or rehabbing a surgically repaired hip in Vail, Colo.
At this point, after all the damage A-Rod has inflicted on himself, why would anyone be surprised that Rodriguez would dive into a self-loving photo shoot, go ahead with an interview about Madonna and the rest, and then plead with a Details writer to keep his favorite Madonna song out of the piece after he'd been confronted by SI's Selena Roberts on her steroid scoop?
Fire Gus Oseary. Madonna needs to push the envelope in the entertainment arena, and her willingness and ability to shock is the foundation of her long-lasting empire. So yes, her manager is the last guy in the world who should be advising Rodriguez on anything.Lose Ben Porritt. If A-Rod was going to hire a crisis manager, shouldn't he have picked one from the Obama camp instead of the McCain camp? You know, the winner instead of the loser? Rodriguez's national image isn't shaped by political commentators on the Sunday morning talk shows, but by the New York sports media. Porritt doesn't know the terrain.Buy out Scott Boras. The uber-agent made A-Rod rich beyond his wildest dreams, but by placing his client in the baseball wasteland that is Texas he ultimately cost him his cherished position at short. The World Series opt out should've been the clincher. Rodriguez should pay Boras his contract commission and find a user-friendly rep a little less interested in growing the individual brand and a lot more interested in repairing A-Rod's relationship with the club and fan base.Stop calling Warren Buffett and Katie Couric. They're not going to help A-Rod get a big hit in October. Rodriguez is so caught up in transcending baseball, in establishing himself as a captain of other industries, that he's forgotten what made him rich and famous in the first place. Just hit the ball, Alex. And hit it when it counts.Wear a WWJD bracelet. What Would Jeter Do? Every time A-Rod is about to make a critical career choice — like whether to stick around for the finish of an All-Star Game played in Yankee Stadium's final season — he should ask himself that question 305 million times.In the end, a highly improbable Rodriguez transformation — from a distant, isolated, ring-free megastar to a drama-free, team-first winner — would be a hell of a story to cover.
New Yorkers love flawed and scarred figures.
They love flawed and scarred figures who win redemptive championships even more.
Rodriguez can't do anything about steroids, other than stay away from them for the balance of his career. He can do something about the rest of the tobacco juice he keeps spitting all over his reputation.
When A-Rod returns from surgery, he has to trade an entire team of failed advisers out of his life and limit his crisis managers to the Yankees coaching staff.
Oh, and one other thing: He needs to fall out of love with the hopelessly lost soul he's kissing in the mirror.
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